The wise woman builds her house,
But with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down. Proverbs 14:1
It’s so easy to “keep going” with life’s busy-ness and not take the time to take care of yourself. I am probably guiltier than anyone for pushing myself passed my capacity (a post from before – how I have been learning about my capacity), trying to reach way beyond my limits, and not producing the best quality results. Admittedly, there are definitely seasons in life where we need to stretch and push further than our current margins to experience breakthrough. But not every single week day.
Simply put: whatever we put our time into, we are essentially putting our efforts into building. If I don’t take time for the things that I deem as important, they will rot away. Much like a pile of lumber sitting for years just waiting to be put to use. If all of my time goes into cleaning my house, my children will suffer. If all of my time is allotted to keeping up relationships around me, my relationship with God and my family is affected and neglected. Whatever your “perfect” is, creating it is nearly impossible without the expense of something else.
I want to be a woman that not only builds up my home but BUILDS up the RIGHT things in my home. In the journey to do so, I need to esteem what is “right” for me and my family and what is important. Life has so many good things, I just need to invest in the right things to have the best outcomes.
1. Take time for myself
“You can’t give what you’re not receiving…” well said, Mrs. Joyce Meyers. I need to take time to a) fill up on God’s never-ending love and 2) take time every once in a while to have some real Sarah-time. Me time is important, whether you have a family or not, if you’re an introvert or an extrovert, we all need to take time to recharge. As I’m putting this as number one, it’s so foreign for me to do. Like I stated earlier, this is usually the LAST thing that I do, if I get to me.
2. Taking time for my family
Even when I spend 20 minutes a day, one-on-one with each of the boys, I notice a huge shift in their attitudes … especially when we’re having a rough one. It even helps their behaviour so why I wouldn’t do this makes no sense! The time that we can spend as a family unit, I feel, is invaluable as we only get to operate as this unit until they themselves have their own families to raise. We’ve got this one shot to make it epic … and that is what we intend to do. The first step: taking the time for them.
The same goes for time spent with Matt. If we are able to even connect for a 15 minute “conclusion of the day” conversation, it does wonders. C o m m u n i c a t i o n is so huge and you need to be willing to make time for it. And according to this article, you need to date once a week to keep your marriage alive(!).
3. Take time to CHOOSE what relationships I need to invest in
Maybe this sounds rude or selfish to you, but it has taken me so long to realize that I need to do this. I love people. The energy and life people and relationships bring to me could send me to the moon and back – for my entire life! Something about being in a group of strangers gives me a thrill to just talk and learn from them. Then there’s such an intimacy in a group of close friends that I crave as we’ve been through lots together and will do so for the rest of our lives.
That to say, if I only get my energy from people, I don’t have time to rest and replenish myself to keep going. I burn out, even though I sometimes think I’m invincible to this thing called ‘lack of sleep’.
4. Take time to expand my borders
Borders around my creativity, learning, exploring, relationships, etc. … areas I need to be pushed in order to reach new heights. I think Ed Cole hit it here – You seek the heights of manhood when you seek the depths of God. No border [height] can be enlarged without having a bigger plan [God]. For example, a fence cannot just be pushed out an acre and all of a sudden you own that land within your borders. You need to purchase the land to expand on, map out the new fence line, figure out the investment, put the work into building it, etc. No expanding is ever an over night process, I need to invest the time.
5. Take time to organize/put things in order
We’ve all heard it – clean home, clear mind. And it is so true. My home is by no means in show home condition, but neither is it the most terrible place to be either. It just needs some serious organizing behind the closed cupboard doors!
These 5 priorities may change/morph over the years, but currently, these are areas I need to build up. Even if you are in a similar stage of life as me, I really do think we all have our own tailored list of things that we need to individually be focused on building up.
In the coming days, I plan to expound on how these priority items (for me) can/should be built up. Along the journey, if you have any suggestions or have found practical ways to make these things work all the more smoother, I AM ALL EARS! Use the contact form, comments, or even email me … I’d love to hear from you!
pic pix: peony love, last summer 2014, at home